Cat Nazis Part 3 of 3

Turn up the speakers and check this out.  It's less than 2 minuets long--slightly less time than it took to make. 


Ok so here’s the deal.  I don’t hate cats.  I just hate this cat.  Sometimes.  And the main reason is because I have to mop up pee every day because we can’t let the dogs out while we go to work.  I can’t “train” any of them to do anything because I’m gone for ten hours a day.  The rest of the time is spent cleaning, cooking, selling things on eBay, etc.  Shawn works nine hours per day, then goes to night school.  Can’t get rid of the bird or the cat because Shawn would have a fit.  The dogs are here till they die, so that’s never an option. 

Look, if you are a cat person, that’s cool and that’s your prerogative.  I can’t change your mind and make you believe that cats are not superior beings.  I’m going to even try!  I think it’s absurd that some believe cats are helpless outside or are destroying the bird population.  I gotta tell you, we’ve got trees surrounding our house and all are FILLED to the brim with birds.  If anything, the cats are controlling the bird population.  (Not good enough in my opinion)

My friend Patty, who is a self-described cat-person (“Because you could leave them alone for weeks if you left out enough food and water!”) agreed with me.  She didn’t come at me like a fire and brimstone television preacher! 

Is it “natural” that my dogs pee onto little pads in the laundry room and now the entire house smells like urine?  Is it “natural” for an animal clearly designed for hunting, to be confined within four walls?  Is it “natural” for people to attack others without fully understanding the situation?

Well, that last one rings true, yes.  Personally, I could not be kept inside at all times--even though I’m not an outdoorsy person.  I need fresh air.  My body craves sunlight after I’ve slathered on sunscreen.  And I think it would really be painful to have my fingernails and toenails ripped from my appendages.  I’m not gonna tie the cat to a two-foot long rope in the backyard--OR--keep her confined all day for the rest of her life.

Frickin’ Cat Nazis!  I got news for you people.  ALL animals--I do mean ALL ANIMALS-- started out in the great outdoors.  It was us, we people, that brought them inside and domesticated them and designed chick purses to carry them around in. 

I always wondered how the Egyptians could worship a cat (or any animal for that matter!).  It was here that Cat Nazis were born and decided that cats are better than people, better than all living things and we should reverie them and toss our virgins into fires for them. 

Our cable guy told me he went to an elderly couple’s house on a service call.  They had something like seventeen cats (all inside, all the time) and one them had spayed into the cable box.  That’s not natural.