Drunk Blogging

I am thoroughly embarrassed for my drunk blogging.  Sometimes I do believe that little Facebook mistake may have cost me and it is embarrassing when I vent & I am too lazy to start a new, hidden blog.  I honestly have no idea who can read this, who saw that I listed this blog with facebook long ago & deleted it.

Oh well.  That's what I get for drunk blogging.

The day after my last drunken post, I was offered a token of appreciation at work, a gesture of thanks.  And of course, now I feel like a complete asshole.  That's what I get for drunk blogging.  I know I said that already; I'm not currently drunk, just trying to make a point to myself and the rest of the dummies out there.

The only problem with this is that I am the kind of person who views such a token like, "OK, what are you up to?  What's the catch?"  Because I learned the hard way that you cannot trust anyone for any reason, I am always very suspicious.  And that's just sad.

I suppose most people, whether you work in the home or outside of it, or work two full time jobs both in and out of the home, you tend to feel unappreciated, taken for granted.  This is most certainly true when you're doing both.  To clean up only to have it dirty again, or cluttered, or soiled seems utterly meaningless.  When you do the same things day after day, year after year, only to be right back where you started at the beginning of each new day is down right depressing.

I had made the decision that I would no longer be picking up after people at work, constantly going behind them.  And yet, it still lingers at home. After all, this is why God put me on this earth, isn't it?

I often used to think that I had no life goals, no dreams.  I now have figured out what I want in my life:  Simplicity. 

I can life without the chaos, the clutter, the messes that cause anxiety.  "Can" is an operative word here.  I "would like to" is more appropriate.  But as I see it, that may never happen until I am dead.  And that's just sad.